Over the last several weeks we have been talking to customers about what they like and dislike about their storage providers. Listening to the stories of what they are told by their OEM salesman and engineers and comparing that to the reality of service and support after product delivery reveals a startling comparison of promises versus reality.
Dealing with the big Storage OEMS’s reminded one customer of The Star Trek scene of Fizzbin. I like that comparison.
Fizzbin – The Rules of the Game
Kirk: The name of the game is called… Fizzbin. Each player gets 6 cards, except for the player on the dealer’s right, who gets 7.
Thug: On the right.
Kirk: Yeah. The second card is turned up, except on Tuesdays.
Kirk: Ohh! Look what you’ve got- 2 jacks. You got a half-fizzbin already.
Thug: I need another jack?
Kirk: No. If you got another jack, why you’d have a shralk.
Thug: A shralk?
Kirk: Yes, you’d be disqualified. No, what you need now is either a king and a deuce, except at night, of course, when you’d need a queen and a four.
Thug: Except at night.
Kirk: Right. Oh, look at that, you’ve got another jack! How lucky you are! How wonderful for you! Now if you didn’t get another jack, if you had gotten a king, why then you’d get another card except when it’s dark , when you’d have to give it back.
Thug: If it were dark on Tuesday.
Kirk: Yes, but what you’re after is a royal fizzbin, but the odds of getting a royal fizzbin are astron – Spock, what are the odds on getting a royal fizzbin?
Spock: I have never computed them, Captain.
Kirk: Well, they’re astronomical, believe me. Now, for the last card, we’ll call it a kronk. You got that?
Compare Captain Kirk’s exchange with the response you get when you are trying to navigate the RMA process or find out where your 4 hour parts guy is.
Repeatedly we are told that Zerowait provides easy to understand service and support, and no hassles. Things don’t have to be confusing, so why do manufacturers make it that way?